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December 2008

 Clive Graham-Ranger

Spoiled for choice is one of the first thoughts that comes to mind when it comes to the long-haul golfing traveller.
Where Eagles Dare
Two courses, one PGA-rated the other the home of a round in the prestigious Asian Tour series of tournaments, have successfully bedded down within spitting distance of
the renowned Angkor temple trail outside Siem Reap

Adam Robertson knows how lucky he is. Every day he drives to work he glances back at the red dust rising in plumes behind his car and looks forward to the vista of greensward and sculpted bunkers that are his pride, joy and his customers’ daily challenge. Robertson is the smiling Scottish operations manager at the Angkor Golf Resort off National Road 6. He has a lot to be happy about. The Nick Faldo-designed course is the multimillion-dollar investment of Indonesian casino tycoon Holic Tandijono. At 33 he is the eldest of three brothers whose competitive edge has been the driving force behind their various highly successful business ventures.
This magnificent course has to be Holic’s crowning achievement. For even the highest handicap club golfer its statistics are mouthwatering: 7,279yds, par 72, four par five, 400yd-plus (one is more than 500yds) holes and four par three, 114yd-134yd holes with two picture-postcard signature holes. With extremely generous fairways, inviting yet complex greens, water and sand hazards that will catch out all but the most accurate swinger, by western standards the course is a bargain.
As is the stunning, Sofitel-managed Phokeethra Country Club. With the likes of Hun Sen, Cambodia’s recently re-elected political leader who was the first to play nine holes on both courses, a raft of heads of state and political and military top brass in the region have taken on their challenging fairways and greens.
Contrast and compare is definitely the name of these disparate rounds of golf. Where the Angkor Resort course could be described as a links affair (flat but with strategically placed and cunningly shaped sand traps), Phokeethra’s challenge is to avoid the water hazards on all but one hole (a more expensive penalty both in strokes and financially). Talking of which, a round at Angkor will set you back $100 plus a compulsory $12 caddy fee and $36 for a two-person golf cart (which in the heat of Cambodia is thoroughly recommended). A round at Phokeethra with similar add-ons for carts, caddies and other extras starts from about $120. Both courses offer financially favourable golf and accommodation packages.
Phokeethra’s facilities are more advanced than those at Angkor, largely due to the speed with which the course and clubhouse were completed in time to host the inaugural Johnnie Walker Cambodian Open leg of the Asian Tour in 2007. About 20 minutes from the airport, the 7,145yd, par 72 course was designed by the Bangkok-based Designer Golf company under the watchful eye of Weerayudt Phetbuasak. Its signature hole is the double-water carry 18th island hole. Its historic links have not been forgotten, either, as between the 9th green and 10th tee is a restored Roluh bridge, which dates back to the 11th-century Khmer empire.
Over a cool drink in the clubhouse bar at the Angkor Resort, Robertson explained that before the course was sculpted into its present excellence, a de-mining team probed the site and found several pieces of unexploded ordnance. He also admits that explaining the game of golf and training the 50 caddies and other staff recruited from nearby villages wasn’t easy, particularly as when first presented with a set of golf clubs they described them as “digging tools”. Although some “rabbit” golfers could prove them right.

Adapted Turtle

Deep within a forest a little turtle began to climb a tree. After hours of effort he reached the top, jumped into the air waving his front legs and crashed to the ground. After recovering, he slowly climbed the tree again, jumped, and fell to the ground.

The turtle tried again and again while a couple of birds sitting on a branch watched his sad efforts. Finally, the female bird turned to her mate.

"Dear," she chirped, "I think it's time to tell him he's adopted."

Mother In Law

A husband and wife walked up to view the body of his mother-in-law at the funeral.

As he began to weep, his wife slapped him and said: “Why are you crying, you never liked my mother anyway!”

The husband replied, “I know, I thought I saw her move!!”

Smart Diagnosis Machine

One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Jack says to Mike behind him, "My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I better see a doctor."

"Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies. "There's a diagnostic computer at the drugstore at the corner. Just give it a urine sample and the computer'll tell you what's wrong and what to do about it. It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars...a hell of a lot cheaper than a doctor."

So Jack deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to the drugstore. He deposits ten dollars, and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits.

Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout: You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity. It will improve in two weeks.

That evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Jack began wondering if the computer could be fooled. He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and masturbated into the mixture for good measure.

Jack hurries back to the drugstore, eager to check the results. He deposits ten dollars, pours in his concoction, and awaits the results.

The computer prints the following:

1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener.
2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo.
3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.
4. Your wife is pregnant...twin girls. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.
5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get better.
You may be pleasantly surprised at the range of activities available in Siem Reap. Balloon and helicopter rides, bike tours, theatre, Apsara dance shows, museums, trips to the Tonle Sap lake and the Cultural Village are just a few examples of what you can see and do if you need a break from the temples. And now there are two international standard golf courses to, with a third scheduled to open during 2009.
Angkor Golf Resort
Designed by European legend Nick Faldo, Cambodia's newest golf course is rated to US PGA standards. Featuring well maintained Paspalum grass, it has been built to challenge all levels of golfers.
063 761 139
www.angkor-golf.com
[Opening times: please call]
Angkor National Museum
The grand entrance that reveals the glory of the Angkor civilisation. Experience Cambodian history at its best within eight galleries of genuine artifacts and state of the art multi-media.
Road to Angkor - 063 966 601
[Opening times: 9am-8pm]
Angkor Night Market
Whilst mainly a market there are various shows and other special events as well including 3D movies shown daily. See pages 26-29 for more information.
off Sivatha Street
www.angkornightmarket.com
[Opening times: 4pm-midnight]
Angkor Hospital for Children
Free medical care from teaching hospital. Donations of blood/money welcome.
Achamean Street - 063 963 409
[Opening times: 6am-9pm]
Angkor Silk Farm
Silk farm with exhibition and workshop tours. See the entire silk creation process.
Puok village (16km W of town) - 063 963 330
[Opening times: 7am-5pm]
Angkor Wat in Miniature
Miniature replicas of Angkor Wat and other temples by Dy Proeung. Admission $1.50.
off East river Road
[Opening times: 10am-7pm]
Angkor Wishing Museum
An eclectic collection of Buddhist relics, artifacts, robes, holy medicines and more.
Airport Road - 063 762 862
[Opening times: 9am-6pm]
Apsara Theatre
Traditional dance performances staged each night in an elegant wooden theatre. Two shows every evening from 6:30-7:50 and 8:15-10pm.
off East river Road (Angkor Village Hotel) -
063 963 561
[Opening times: 6:30-7:50pm, 8:15-10pm]
Balloon Rides
Tethered balloon offering spectacular views of Angkor Wat and other temples.
off Airport Road - 012 520 810
[Opening times: 6am-5pm]
Bird Watching Tours
Guided tours provided by the Angkor Centre for Conservation of Biodiversity.
Kbal Spean - 011 426 856
[Opening times: please call]
Buffalo Trails
Be a responsible traveller. Day and overnight trips with local family in the Siem Reap countryside and in villages on the Tonle Sap Great Lake. Certified by WildAsia. 012 297 506
www.buffalotrails-cambodia.com
[Opening times: please call]
Cambodian Cultural Village
Wax museum, also models of various national landmarks, houses and pagodas.
National Road 6 (admission $12) - 063 963 098
[Opening times: 9am-9pm]
Center for Khmer Studies
Visit the library, Cambodia's largest public facility outside of Phnom Penh.
Wat Damnak area - 063 964 385
[Opening times: 8am-noon, 1:30-5:30pm]
Chong Khneas Tours
Boat trips around a floating village on the Tonle Sap. Ask your hotel for details.
Chong Khneas village.
[daily depatures]
Concerts by Beatocello
Cello performances by Dr Beat Richner. Donations of blood or money welcome.
Road to Angkor - (Jayavarman VII Hospital)
www.beatocello.com
[Opening times: 7:15pm Sat]
Cookery Classes
Choose the ingredients and cook your own meal with help from the chef.
Old market area (Angkor Palm restaurant) -
063 761 436
[Opening times: 10am-10pm]
Cookery Classes
Culinary tours to local markets followed by cooking classes at the restaurant.
River Garden Guesthouse - 063 963 400
[Opening times: please call]
Elephant Rides
See the temples from another perspective. Rides from $10 per half hour.
near Bayon Temple and Angkor Thom.
[Opening times: 6am-6pm]
Gecko Environment Center
Floating environment centre promoting environmental awareness and education.
Chong Khneas village - 063 963 525
[Opening times: 8:30am-5pm]
Happy Ranch (The)
The unique horse farm of Siem Reap: from sunrise to sunset enjoy unforgettable rides in the countryside, and discover hidden paths and temples on our Cambodian horses.
1.5km W of town - 012 920 002, 016 920 002
www.thehappyranch.com
[Opening times: sunrise to sunset]
Harley Tours Cambodia
See the temples by Harley-Davidson! Custom tours available from 1-5 days.
012 948 529, 012 385 157
[Opening times: please call]
Helicopters Cambodia
See the temples from the air. Flights from US$90. Other packages available too.
658, Hup Quan Street - 063 963 316
www.helicopterscambodia.com
[Opening times: please call]
Hidden Cambodia
Established operator providing exciting and educational Cultural, Adventure (Dirt Bike, 4WD, cycling, trekking), eco-tourism & humanitarian tours. Specialists in Koh Ker, Preah Vihear, Kampong Khleang and Preah Khan. New eco lodge now open.
012 655 201, 012 934 412
www.hiddencambodia.com
[Opening times: please call]
Kampong Khleang
Visits to villages on the floodplains of the Tonle Sap. Call Tara River Boat for details.
35km SE of town.
[daily departures]
Kampong Phluk
Visits to villages on the floodplains of the Tonle Sap. Call Tara River Boat for details.
16km SE of town.
[daily departures]
Krousar Thmey
Exhibition centre focused on the Tonle Sap lake. Dance and shadow puppetry too.
Road to Angkor - 063 964 694
[Opening times: please call]
Nathan Horton Photography
Travel photography workshops and day trips from Phnom Penh and longer guided photography tours of Angkor Temples with technical training if needed.
092 526 706
www.nathanhortonphotography.com
[Opening times: please call]
Osmose NGO
Be a responsible traveller. Visit Prek Toal bird sanctuary and the floating villages. All proceeds benefit the local community. Booking 48 hours before.
012 832 812
www.osmosetonlesap.net
[Opening times: please call]
Paneman
Boat trips on the Tonle sap, scientific and jungle expeditions, treks, trips and more.
063 761 759
[Opening times: please call
Phokeethra Country Club
World-class 18-hole golf course open all year round. Driving range, putting green and pitching area. Onsite pro shop and restaurant.
off Airport Road (approx 16km west of town) -
063 964 600
www.sofitel.com
[Opening times: 6am-5pm]
Prek Toal Bird Sanctuary
Breeding ground and sanctuary for endangered birds in the Tonle Sap biosphere.
Tonle Sap lake - 063 963 710
[Opening times: please call]
Quad Adventure Tours
Explore the Cambodian countryside on our fully-equipped ATVs - 45 minutes to one day.
092 787 216
[Opening times: please call]
Sam Veasna Center
Tours to remote habitats to promote wildlife conservation in the Tonle Sap region.
Wat Bo Area - 063 761 597
[Opening times: please call]
Sangkheum Center for Children
Tours of the Center as well as of the nearby iron workshop and silk lab.
National Road 6 (Puok District) - 012 675 637
[Opening times: please call]
Singing Tree Centre
Yoga and meditation classes as well as info for volunteering and eco-tourism.
Wat Bo Road - 092 635 500
[Opening times: 7:30am-9pm]
Sokha Helicopters
Scenic flights around Siem Reap as well as charter flights to other destinations.
24, Sivatha Street - 063 966 072
[Opening times: 8:30am-5pm]
Tara River Boat
Chong Khneas-tour. Visit the floating village, crocodile & fish farms, Environmental & Gecko Center, followed by a 2 course meal with drinks on Tara. Half day and sunset tours available. Free pickup from hotel.
Airport Road (behind Vietnam Airlines) - 092 957 765
www.taraboat.com
[Opening times: please call]
Terre Cambodge
Long established Tour Operator specialised in eco-tours: 1-14 days cycling Cambodia by quality mountain bike, trekking in remote areas, homestay in the villages and on the lake and birdwatching.
Hup Quan Street - 063 964 557
www.terrecambodge.com
[Opening times: please call]

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